How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

January 22, 2021

Dear Achona,

How do you stop comparing yourself to others?


Dear Anonymous,

Honestly, I don’t believe we will ever be able to stop comparing ourselves to others. There will always be someone who is “better.” And that’s okay. A little competition is inevitable. Of course, that’s not to say comparison is a healthy habit. 

Here are a few methods I practice on the reg to reduce feelings of presumed inferiority:

  1. Acknowledge your flaws and embrace them: math and I do not get along. It takes quite a bit of practice for me to understand a concept, but that’s okay. Just as it’s okay for a peer to perform better than me on an algebra test. Do I want to be a mathematician? Absolutely not. So why let their successes weaken my worth? 
  2. Practice gratitude: gratefulness is the antithesis of envy. Fortunately, there is so much in life to be thankful for. So acknowledge all of it. All of the worries, laughs, and tears have gotten you to where you are now, and you are stronger because of them.
  3. Accept yourself as you are: there is only one you, and no one can be a better you than you. So be proud of yourself. Be confident in yourself. Be content with yourself. 

I hope these practices help, but if you are in need of additional assurance, refer to the following articles:

“An Open-Letter to Young Women”

“Talkin’ Bodies”

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